Forever the "Inbetweener"
Too much for one standard.
Not enough for another.
It's exhausting. Not because anyone has done anything wrong. Not because anyone is to blame.
Everyone is entitled to fantasy. But it doesn't negate from the feeling that I'll never be "enough"
I need somewhere I can stop competing.
Somewhere I feel safe and chosen. Where I am desired & accepted enough to enjoy this part of myself again without worrying that one eye is always on somebody bigger, smaller, younger, prettier or more extreme.
A gorgeous soul I met here once told me I should "uncouple how I look from how I should feel" about myself because it was everything else that made me "super sexy" and not how fat I am, even in this space.
So, to all my fellow inbetweeners -
If a connection consistently leaves you feeling less than then it's worth asking if it's still worth pursuing.
You don't have to be the biggest.
You don't have to be the smallest.
You don't have to be the most extreme version of anything.
You deserve to be celebrated as the whole package - as you.
13 hours
